Dig Deeper into Sunday’s Gospel: Read Matthew 25:1–13

I cannot remember a time when I didn’t struggle with some level of insomnia. As a child, it was an overactive imagination and fears of nighttime monsters that kept me awake. Into young adulthood, married life, and motherhood, I found myself obsessively ruminating on just about everything: tests, presentations, conversations I wished I had handled differently, opportunities I missed to be more patient or attentive, the chores I left unfinished, and my endless to-do list.

Which is why one small detail in this Sunday’s gospel from Matthew caught my attention: all ten virgins in Jesus’ parable fell asleep.

In Matthew 25:1–13, Jesus likens the kingdom of heaven to ten virgins awaiting their bridegroom’s arrival. As was the custom for Jewish weddings at this time, the women of the bridal party awaited the bridegroom’s arrival and accompanied him in a procession to meet his bride and join the marriage celebration. Because the groom’s procession took place after dark, lamps were needed to light the way. But in a time long before we could text or check a Life360 location, the bridal party couldn’t track the bridegroom’s whereabouts. They knew he was coming, but not precisely when. Therefore, the young women had to be prepared with enough oil to keep their lamps burning through their period of waiting. 

Five “wise” women had brought extra oil to sustain their lamps. The other five, without any additional oil, were considered “foolish.” The bridal party was expected to remain alert. Yet, when the bridegroom was delayed, all ten grew drowsy and fell asleep—the wise and the foolish alike. 

In a parable that concludes with Jesus commanding us to “stay awake” (Matthew 25:13), both the wise and the unprepared women still fell asleep. Which leaves me wondering if our Lord is inviting us to consider what true spiritual vigilance looks like. The difference between the wise and foolish wasn’t who managed to stay awake the longest; it was who was ready when they were awakened. 

Maybe it’s because sleep is so personally elusive, but I find consolation in this small detail. Even the wise women succumbed to a very real human limitation. And isn’t that also true of us, as we await the coming of our Bridegroom? 

Waiting for Christ’s return isn’t easy. We don’t know when He will come again, nor how many days we have been given in this earthly life. And, while we wait, we will grow weary. We will struggle. We will experience moments of doubt, discouragement, and exhaustion. 

But God, our Father and Creator, knows our humanity and our limitations. He doesn’t ask us to disregard our need for rest, but rather to faithfully tend to the life of grace He has given us here and now. For while our earthly lives are finite, the hope of eternal life has been held out to us in Christ. And the time we have been given is a precious opportunity to prepare and ready our hearts for the moment we are awakened to meet our beloved Bridegroom. 

Saint Paul offers us words of hope in our second reading, “For the Lord himself, with a word of command, with the voice of an archangel and with the trumpet of God, will come down from heaven, and the dead in Christ will rise first” (1 Thessalonians 4:16). And then, this beautiful promise: “Thus we shall always be with the Lord” (1 Thessalonians 4:17).

Our preparation isn’t simply for an event at the end of our lives. It is for an encounter with the One who loves us, the One who invites us into the eternal joy of His heavenly wedding feast.

Yet believing the Bridegroom is coming is not the same as being ready to receive Him. All ten women knew the bridegroom was coming. All ten intended to meet him. But only five had prepared for the possibility of a prolonged wait. Notice that the wise ones weren’t spared the waiting or the weariness. Instead, they had prepared for both and attended to what would sustain their lamps until he came: their oil.

What does this mean for us, as women awaiting the coming of Christ, to tend our oil?

In a 2017 Angelus reflection on this very gospel, Pope Francis described the lamps as symbols of our faith and the oil as the charity that nourishes that faith, allowing it to bear fruit in our lives. He reminds us that being prepared to meet Christ requires more than professing our belief in Him. Our faith must be lived out through love of God and neighbor. In his words, “Faith inspires charity and charity safeguards faith.”[1]

Tending our oil doesn’t necessarily require extraordinary acts of holiness. Often, it is through the everyday opportunities God provides for us to choose to love as He loves that our faith is nourished, and our lamps are kept filled and shining brightly. Persevering in our prayer life and reading His Word leads to deeper intimacy with Him. By receiving the sacraments, we are nourished with grace that strengthens and emboldens us. And through our acts of charity, forgiveness, generosity, and service, our faith bears fruit. 

Our preparation for the Bridegroom isn’t about accumulating spiritual accomplishments or disregarding our humanity in pursuit of unattainable perfection. Our readiness is made evident in our obedience to what Jesus tells us: “Remain in me, as I remain in you” (John 15:4). This is the tipping point between the wise and the foolish; this is what it means to be truly vigilant: not simply awaiting His coming, but abiding in His presence.

Are we remaining in Christ? Are we receptive to His grace, allowing it to transform, refine, and shape us in His image? Is our faith visible, made tangible in how we love? Even as we wait, especially as we wait?

Maybe this is why we can find consolation in the fact that all ten virgins fell asleep in this parable, because we all will grow weary; we all will need rest. Our Lord isn’t asking us to remain physically awake at all costs, but to live spiritually awake to Him, cultivating a relationship with Him that will endure and shape how we live while we wait. So that when our Bridegroom comes, we will be ready to rise and meet Him, our lamps filled and held aloft.

With you on the journey,
Jeannine

Food for thought or journaling …

As I await the coming of Christ, how am I tending the oil of my spiritual life? What is one small, intentional way I can deepen my relationship with Him?

Lord Jesus, my beloved Bridegroom, draw me closer to Your Sacred Heart. Awaken in me a deeper desire to know You, love You, and remain in You. May my love for You order how I live each day. Stir within me a zeal not just to profess my faith in You, but to love generously and serve faithfully here and now, on this side of heaven. Amen.

P.S. What does it mean that Jesus is our Bridegroom? Explore this beautiful imagery in greater depth in the Walking with Purpose Bible study Spiritual Motherhood, Lesson 15.

[1] Francis, “Angelus: 12 November 2017,” The Holy See, https://www.vatican.va/content/francesco/en/angelus/2017/documents/papa-francesco_angelus_20171112.html.