Dig Deeper into Sunday’s Gospel: Read Matthew 2:13–15,19–23

The best part of our Christmas gatherings can often be the most challenging: family. All the people gathered around the same table. It is a blessing, don’t get me wrong. But let’s be honest. No matter how much we love them, people aren’t always the easiest to please, which makes things tricky for a people pleaser with dreams of everyone getting along. As Jerry Seinfeld once said, “There’s no such thing as fun for the whole family.” I laughed so hard when I heard that because it's oh-so-true.

And yet, family is everything.

How many of us, as little girls, dreamed of having a family of our own? We planned the wedding, chose the names for our future children, and decorated our once-upon-a-time homes. But did we spiritually prepare? Were we aware of the power of family, and the great good that flows from our domestic church? More importantly, did we realize that a “yes” to family was also a “yes” to the battle? 

There’s no gentle way to say this. The devil hates the family. 

To better understand why this post just took a terrible turn, let’s consider the Holy Family, Mary, Joseph, and Jesus, whom we commemorate this weekend. Not only the perfect model of a faithful family, but also of the war waged against us. From the moment they said “yes,” the battle to tear them apart was on. It all began with Joseph’s temptation to divorce Mary (Matthew 1:19–22). Next up, they fled to Egypt as Herod sought to kill Jesus. The enemy’s plan was clear: destroy the family. And his plan hasn't changed.

It’s easy to understand why the devil hates the Holy Family. They are a reflection of the Trinity and a symbol of God's victory. But why my family? Why the target on my kid's back? Why the relentless arrows strategically aimed at my marriage? 

Demons attack the family because they hate that we have been made in the image and likeness of God. They can’t handle the fact that we are fruitful, creative, and bring forth life, playing an essential role in God’s plan of salvation. “Your yes to family,” writes author Kathleen Beckman, “is an echo of the yes of the Holy Family,”[1] and safe to say, they hate that, too.

Family is a battlefield. But make no mistake, the war is not between Satan and us; it is between Satan and God. And how does Satan hurt the Father? He goes after His children. He studies us, noting what increases our anxiety, and our places of vulnerability. He sees what we love and cherish most—our family—and goes in for the kill.

My family has weathered its share of attacks, and I would be naive to believe we are in the clear. 1 Peter 5:8 commands us to “Be sober and vigilant. Your opponent, the devil is prowling around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour.” While I appreciate the rest I am currently enjoying, I must stay alert. In fact, in the hours I have spent crafting this blog post, my husband and I have argued over money twice and what to make for dinner. I see you, Satan.

The battle is fierce, but family is stronger, and with the example of the Holy Family, we can fight and win. If your home feels under attack, let’s see how they can help us.

Saint Joseph, Pillar of Families
In Matthew’s gospel, Joseph, the head of the family, receives instructions from God in a dream, and when he wakes, he acts immediately. Joseph knows who God is; he recognizes His voice and immediately responds. Obedience to God’s plan is the fruit of an intimate relationship and a powerful weapon. Joseph reminds us to rest with God, so that when we hear His warning, we take immediate action. 

Mother Mary, Full of Grace
I shared with my spiritual director the difficulty of letting my husband lead when I am uncertain he is making the right decision. Her response? “Mary was greater than Joseph, and she let him lead.” In our gospel, Mary does not argue or resist; she trusts in the plan. What I have found helpful in releasing control over certain situations is being in a state of grace, which strengthens my faith and makes my “prayers for the family more efficacious.”[2] It also helps us to keep the structure of our family rightly ordered by respecting our husbands and trusting in their care for us.

Jesus, Son of God
God, who could have grandly entered this world, chose to come as a helpless infant, utterly dependent on Mary and Joseph, entrusting His life to them. When making the long journey to Egypt, I imagine that Mary held Jesus close, eyes on Him, her grip gentle but firm. Yes, He was her baby, but also her God. When we, too, face a stretch of road that feels uncertain and frightening, we can push back the fear by focusing on Jesus and holding Him close. He is with us in the battle. We do not fight alone.

If your personal “flight to Egypt” threatens your family, remember that it has been said that, “no created good is under greater attack than a holy family, and yet it also remains a beacon and tower testifying to God’s love in a world that hungers for it.”[3] 

Keep fighting, sister. Your family is worth it.

Food for thought or journaling …

How are you staying awake to the battle in your home and family? How can the Holy Family help you become a spiritual warrior for your family?

Saint Joseph, pillar of families, protect our families.
Mother Mary, full of grace, hold our families.
Jesus, Son of God, be with our families.
Amen.

[1] Kathleen Beckman, A Family Guide to Spiritual Warfare: Strategies for Deliverance and Healing, (Sophia Press, 2020), 8.
[2] Ibid., 66.
[3] Most Reverand Thomas J. Paprocki, J.C.D.